You sign in your child to the church nursery. Make sure to give them hugs and kisses as you pass off their bag to the nursery caregiver and in return they suffocate your leg, begging you to stay. Separation Anxiety is real and can be rough for children and parents alike. Maybe you are a first time parent with a ten month old. You want them to be included in the nursery events each week but just cannot stomach the thought of dropping them off with a complete stranger for 45 minutes to an hour and not be with them. Separation Anxiety occurs when one person becomes upset or overwhelmed at the absence of another individual. As a Nursery Coordinator, I see this first hand each week. However, I am here to say that parents, there is a way to overcome the crying and worrying.
Routine
A routine is vital in most children’s lives. Feeding routine, sleeping routine and even a drop-off routine. As we all know life can be chaotic, but the more of a routine that is establish with your child, the less anxiety they will develop when they are dropped off at the nursery or daycare. The first part of this routine is probably the most important, and that is consistency. The more consistent parents are each week in taking them to the nursery, the more adjusted they will become. It’s almost like your child is your very own accountability partner, who is banking on their parents to go to church each Sunday morning. What more can we ask for? The second aspect of routine that you will want to keep in mind is the way in which your child is dropped off. The less dramatic and exaggerated the goodbye is, the less likely they are to get upset. By doing this they can focus more of their attention on what is going on with the rest of the class. A simple “see you later”, kiss goodbye or whatever is special between you and your little one will do the job. Sometimes it may even help at first to have the teacher help with the transition.
Something Borrowed
A sure fire way to help your little one adjust to time away from their parents is to leave behind something of yours; a scarf, blanket from home or even a sweater or hoodie. Why, you ask? Well, if your child starts to get upset and cannot be calmed down this is an awesome technique for the nursery caregiver to help soothe them. An item they can cuddle with that has a familiar scent of their parent(s) will help them feel a sense of your presence with them. This is especially great for those under the age of one. This approach also works well for parents. Surprisingly, for moms and dads who return to work from having a newborn, packing a small babies blanket for your rough moments can be soothing.
Keep in Touch
For parents, any way that you can keep tabs or check-in on your little ones, helps you feel a sense of security. In our church nursery, we offer a service to the parents, especially visiting families, where they have access to text the nursery to check in on their child at any time during the service. Some churches or daycares may offer a text update or even a pager system, where they contact the parents via text or pager if there is an emergency or just to let them know how their little one is adjusting. An open door policy is always a key point to look for when dropping your child off. The opportunity to sit in with your child, should always be an offer that is on the table. This, in my opinion, is a form of security for you and your family.
For any parent and child, being away from each other can be rough and sad at the same time, however, the key point to remember is the purpose behind the separation. Your child is learning about God on a level that is best suited for his/her age while Christian morals and values are being reinforced. Let’s not forget your purpose for taking your child to the nursery, you are allowing yourself to be free of mommy/daddy duties so that you can be more attentive to the Holy Spirit, the message and what the Pastor is speaking about.
So the next time you take your child to the nursery or contemplate if it’s worth the anxiety it creates, don’t allow the enemy to deprive you and your child from experiencing an amazing church service. When you and your child are ready, God will lead you.
#buildingbiblebabies
#separationanxiety
#mommywillberightback
No comments:
Post a Comment